Dear Paige,

You are 18 today! A day that I know you have been waiting for ages! Or so it seems. You’re finally ready to move on, become more independent, head to college, make new friends, and have a lot of new adventures. Your life has just begun, and I can’t wait to see what life has left to offer you or what you choose to do with your life. I would be lying if I said this day was filled with complete happiness.

It was 830a on the 6th of May 2005 when you came into our world. Our first born. The one that changed our world forever. I will be honest, I had absolutely zero idea what to do with you or how to take care of you. But there we were, early 20’s and parents to this tiny, precious little human. Looking back now, I think we did ok.

Definitely this was the quickest life experience I learned in my lifetime. I also learned on this day that my life would never be the same again. Where it was just me and your dad and now there is this tiny human staring back at us who needed us, who we put above everything and everyone else.

You have grown into a stunning young woman with a fiery spirit. You don’t like to be labeled or defined, but I think I understand what you are all about. You are passionate, driven, creative, and independent. You are as brilliant as your namesake and yet your heart is fragile. I want to protect you against pain but know that I can’t. You will go into the world and laugh with new friends and cry on someone else’s shoulder. I won’t be there, but I will always be there. You are a part of me, as I am you.

I remember when people used to tell me “Enjoy the time with them while they are little,” but I had no idea that the years would go by so fast. And yet here we are … you are 18.

If I could turn the clock back a bit, I would play hide’n’seek with you a little longer, let you stay in the bath until your fingers were shriveled up like little grapes, let you take all my CDs out of their cases, cuddle up together on the couch for a nap one more afternoon. 

You rocked into my world with your bald head and tiny body, but those long legs – frog legs. From that moment I grew up and since then I have accepted that you are growing up a little more and needed me a little less. Today hurts more than other, as today you are a brand-new adult and soon, you’ll be leaving me for your new adventures that life has to offer.

I’m not worried that you won’t be able to handle everything that life throws at you – you are the strongest willed, determined young woman I know; I am sad today because I don’t want to let you go, not just yet.

I know that I have to. Before I let you go, there are just a few things that I want to tell you: over the last 18 years I have cried many tears over and for you. I have cried when you were little and fell and hurt yourself, when you were little, and I had to say no, and you just accepted it. I’ve cried more recently during those (nightmare) teenage years when you’ve been short-tempered and those arguments that we had left me feeling like I’d failed as a mother – those arguments that are soon forgotten.

I can’t put into words how proud I am of you. I am proud of the determined, ambitious, kind, and generous young woman you have turned into. I am taking some of the credit for that! I am proud and a little in awe that my little girl has grown up to be such an amazing young woman. 

There are exciting times ahead for you – graduating from college, your first proper job, first house, maybe marriage and some kids, or maybe you’ll embark on a fantastic career and life changing experience or traveling the world! There will be times of sadness too. Someone will break your heart, unrequited love, fallouts with friends, disappointments over jobs.

I won’t send you off with any pearls of wisdom. You don’t need them. I just hope that you continue through life with the kindness, tenacity, determination, and ambition that you have started it with. You are a wonderful human being, and I will love you forever. 

Happy 18th Birthday!